Why No Drinking Vows Don't Work

Recently both my roommate and my girlfriend made a vow to give up drinking. And as usual both broke this vow. For some reason it seems that no drinking vows do not last that long. I think a large part of the high failure rate of no drinking vows is because they usually come about the day after a drinking binge when it sounds like a good idea. But then life after the hangover begins. And this may sound bad, but drinking a little makes life a little more tolerable, especially during a full work week sitting next to your boss with nothing to do. That's why I've had a least two ales every day this week. I don't think that the world will every be able to rid itself of alcohol despite some of bad decisions that people make when they drink. Like Homer said, "They tried Prohibition in the movies and it didn't work."

Having Fun and Paying the Price

Going out to a bar and eating and drinking is one of the most fun things that I do. I like going out and enjoying some delicious beers. Yet I realize how much of a price I pay to do that. First I have to pay the money to eat and drink at the bar and that expense adds up qiuckly. Then I have to pay the price of not sleeping well and being tired at work the next day. Then there is the whole health thing. I consume so many beer calories in a regular week I'm surprised that I don't have a big old beer belly. I think that the key is balance. It is alright to have fun by going out but by limiting how many times you go out, eating healthy during the week, drink lots of water, take some fiber and exercise then you pay the price in these much better terms and get to have your cake and eat it too.

Dog Days

I have a question: Why does everyone seem so suprised that it is hot and humid in the middle of July. It's always hot and humid in the middle of July and so many people like to point that out. That was the cover story on the Red Eye yesterday. "IT'S HOT IN MID-JULY" Oh yeah, there is also a war going on in the Middle East, but that's not really as big of news as how hot the sun is.

Message in a Bottle

This past weekend I went to Indiana for a party. I was travelling with a couple that can be a little overwhelming, and by a little overwhelming I mean pretty annoying. My solution ... drink. I know that drinking is my solution for pretty much everything, but its just so versatile. So I started drinking around 5 and we didn't leave until about 8. All in all I had 5 beers in that time. I knew one thing for sure that was not enough. Therefore I was forced to drink in the car. It really was a necessity. Our hosts had a golf tournament and I knew that they would be blitzed so I had to follow suit. During the two hour car ride I polished off a six pack and one cider. Then a problem started to arise, I had to hold it back. Being only a half hour away from our destination was not comforting enough to my blatter. As such I requested use of the 20 oz. Powerade bottle that was in the front seat. With expert timing the song 'Message in a Bottle' came blasting over the radio, the volume was tuned up so no one would be distracted by the sound of me putting my message in the bottle. The only problem was that the 20 oz bottle would have much better suited me had it been a 22 oz. bottle. A little wet I sent my message out to sea, or more accurately out to highway 90. We finally arrived at our destination and requested to use the washing machine. Unfortunately I forgot to actually use the machine and those shorts are still with here at work on a Monday morning.

Planning and Execution

I have been doing a lot of planning lately and I have got to thinking about what is more important planning or execution. Not to say that they are both not important. But would you rather have a great plan and and average execution or an average plan and great execution? I tend to think that you need a great plan from the start and if your execution is subpar then at least you are working productively athough not very well. If you have a shitty plan and execute it perfectly, then you really haven't accomplished that much. I think that a good plan is essential for success, but only true success can come from a well executed great plan.

To Kill a Seagull

I was reading about how the city of Chicago has hired a crack team of Border Collies to chase seagulls off the beaches. Apparently the droppings spread ecoli, so thats not too good. But since my parents own a border collie, I got a kick out of some of the things that they stated in it. Like "the birds will get tired of it before the dogs" and "this breed works tiredlessly to satisfy their human counterparts." They are quite crazy dogs when it comes to their jobs. If only we could get our collie to do something profitable (like the $6,000 these 10 dogs are getting for clearing the beach for the summer). At the very least I bet it'd be pretty entertaining to watch.

My All-CanAmerican Celebration

Yesterday was the 4th of July, America's Independance Day. I could think of no better way to celebrate American than to see the new Superman movie on the IMAX at Navy Pier. But then I was struck by a thought. Although the IMAX embodies many American characteristics (excessiveness, loudness, bigger is better) it was invented by Canadians - Gramame Ferguson, Roman Kroitor, and Robert Kerr. Then I got thinking further. Superman (who is proabably one of the biggest American icons in history) was co-created by a Canadian, Joe Schuster. I thought to myself that maybe it would be better to do these seemingly American activities on Canada Day, July 1st.

Note:
Also in my research, I discovered a Mexican, Guillermo Gonzalez Camarena, invented color TV and a Canadian, Henry Woodword, invented the electric light bulb later sold the idea to Thomas Edison.

In the Zone

This past Saturday I attended a friend's graduation party and to our great enjoyment they provided entertainment in the form of games. Bags, bocce ball, and my favorite foosball. So we played seemingly all the games and I must admit that my early performance in these games was less than steller. As I continued to drink and eat and my performance became more faulty. It was getting to the point that I proclaimed that alcohol hindered your ability to perform. But then something almost magical happened. I reached the point of drunkness where you achieve complete clarity and peak mental ability. I discovered this drinking prime over a game of foosball. I went on to destory the graduate who up to that point had been running the table. As a result of his loss he challenged me to a second match in which I beat him even worse. The third was different and he stole one game in the series. My magical buzz was fading fast. During a short bathroom break I chugged a beer to get back to that perfect state. As Popeye does after eating some spinach, I became unstoppable. I closed out the series and then won three games in a row against a second opponent. I guess the moral of the story is that alcohol helps you do anything, at least when you hit that magical buzz.